Yeah, like the title above, this time is the saddest moment in this
year.. My plan, my hope, my courage was disappeared just with one
sentence from my bos... She said that our company will be close at the
end of this month, ( p_q). Back to my last post, I got so excited about
my plan, outside my main job and with this, I feel like "what the fuck
with this!!???". But more important than that, I feel like a stupid
person who got lied by my boss. How can I become a stupid kid and let
her fool me with her sweet promises???
Especially, when she said that, I just blank, don't say anything (don't know whether I stupid, confuse or something). MY brain denied it several times but that's the reality. It hurt so much.. So many question comes to my mind... How can I live after this?... How can I paid my lil' sister's school fee?? How to paid my fam's life expense?..Why this thing must happen to me?... I always did my best in every job that I have for my fam, my life & my dreams. But why??... World is so unfair!! (ಥ_ಥ). There is a lot of people outhere who rich and use their money everyday just for fun. And here, when someone did their best to make their life better, why must end like this?.....
Yeah, this is my fault.... My fault for being stupid and trust her promise naively. And now, she already had her new position at her new workplace, GREAT!! Even, her bestfriend got a new job directly with her link eventhough, we are THE ONE who got a promise from her. Yeah we are stupid! щ(ಠ益ಠщ). And now, she happilly set her profile pic with her smile face... I don't know what to comment anymore... Coz of her, I lost my job, quit my piano course & don't know how to face my fam, ((T.T； ). I feel so useless and don't know how to trust people anymore... I kept trying my best in everything and this is what I get (I feel like every motivator in this world laugh at me).
A few hours ago, I chat with my coworker. He & I at the same boat, He told me that he cried quietly in the bathroom so his parents didn't know about it. I really2 feel sorry for him, especially when I know his mom was being sick all of this time (for me, that was my dad). I said it's ok to cry at this time eventhough he is a man. "It's heavy for us... Me too, just cry quietly at my room so my parents didn't hear that. Why must this happen to us? We didn't do any mistake at all!", I said. Nowadays, so hard to get a job with good salary, good environment & medical allowance. I just can stare blankly at every job vacancy in front of me. I'm afraid that I will take the wrong decision again like before.... "High paid = Overload job with a lot of overtime", I don't want to lose my special time with my fam, don't want to become a robot with no feelings beside "tired, I must sleep....", don't want to make money as my God...
For now, I don't know the answer.. I just can pray and hope that this will pass....
Especially, when she said that, I just blank, don't say anything (don't know whether I stupid, confuse or something). MY brain denied it several times but that's the reality. It hurt so much.. So many question comes to my mind... How can I live after this?... How can I paid my lil' sister's school fee?? How to paid my fam's life expense?..Why this thing must happen to me?... I always did my best in every job that I have for my fam, my life & my dreams. But why??... World is so unfair!! (ಥ_ಥ). There is a lot of people outhere who rich and use their money everyday just for fun. And here, when someone did their best to make their life better, why must end like this?.....
Yeah, this is my fault.... My fault for being stupid and trust her promise naively. And now, she already had her new position at her new workplace, GREAT!! Even, her bestfriend got a new job directly with her link eventhough, we are THE ONE who got a promise from her. Yeah we are stupid! щ(ಠ益ಠщ). And now, she happilly set her profile pic with her smile face... I don't know what to comment anymore... Coz of her, I lost my job, quit my piano course & don't know how to face my fam, ((T.T； ). I feel so useless and don't know how to trust people anymore... I kept trying my best in everything and this is what I get (I feel like every motivator in this world laugh at me).
A few hours ago, I chat with my coworker. He & I at the same boat, He told me that he cried quietly in the bathroom so his parents didn't know about it. I really2 feel sorry for him, especially when I know his mom was being sick all of this time (for me, that was my dad). I said it's ok to cry at this time eventhough he is a man. "It's heavy for us... Me too, just cry quietly at my room so my parents didn't hear that. Why must this happen to us? We didn't do any mistake at all!", I said. Nowadays, so hard to get a job with good salary, good environment & medical allowance. I just can stare blankly at every job vacancy in front of me. I'm afraid that I will take the wrong decision again like before.... "High paid = Overload job with a lot of overtime", I don't want to lose my special time with my fam, don't want to become a robot with no feelings beside "tired, I must sleep....", don't want to make money as my God...
For now, I don't know the answer.. I just can pray and hope that this will pass....
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